I’ve read articles and listened to radio broadcasts about how boys are doing less well in school than girls, graduate from college less than girls and overall seem to be falling behind academically. Daryl Capuano, author of Motivate Your Son (Student Mastery Publishing, 2012), has read the same articles and seen the statistics. He works [...]
I tried to act calm. Eli seemed to be rolling unflappably with the unexpected event. Meanwhile I started texting everyone I knew with my pithy, yet painful observations about time’s fleeting passage.
No matter how vehemently a parent opposes the whole electronic invasion, eventually your will is eroded and you give in to things you never in a million years believed you’d give into. So I figure it’s only a matter of time before my son manages to coax an evil, spend-your-life-texting implement out of us…
Now my husband and I were shifting into hard sell mode. We whipped out my lap top and pulled up a U-tube of Hacksaw and Hammer effortlessly spinning basketballs on their fingers and balancing them on their noses. After all, a picture is worth a thousand words. It took about 20 seconds and one particularly humorous play in which Flip loses his shirt and shorts and powers down the court in his underwear before Eli was hooked.
Another voice in my head suggested I get myself fed and to work on time and simply allow my husband to handle the poster debacle. Of course that triggered a memory of the time Mark sent Levi to school for dress-up day, costumed in a bed sheet and kitchen mop wig, which wasn’t a disaster I cared to repeat.
My husband is a genius. Please do not, under any circumstance, reveal this information to him. However, I have to tell you that he has invented the single most brilliant behavior modification technique in the history of child-rearing. And it’s actually working!
“I’m grateful for everyone at this table and everything on this table,” he managed to slur out in between massive mouthfuls of mashed potatoes. Now, normally, that might be enough of an answer for an 11 year old boy. But this seemed oddly abrupt for my theatrically inclined, loquacious eldest son who has never missed an opportunity to speak in front of an attentive crowd.
I acknowledge that I am surely the only parent who continuously breaks the unwritten rule to use only Websteresque appropriate language in the presence of children. But have you checked the dictionary lately? Not that this makes it right, but the “F” word is in there, right between “fucoid” (relating to or resembling the rockweeds) and “fuchsite” (a greenish variety of muscovite, high in chromium).
I literally came up with the scheme the other day to feign being an alcoholic so I could be sent to some cushy rehab center in Northern California for a few weeks of sanity restoration.
“But it’s only a matter of time before he becomes the laughing stock of the team. Then the kids will exclude him from everything. No one will ever pass him the ball. It’s just a disaster waiting to happen.”
“O.K.,” I said, rather astonished by his catastrophic prophecy. “But I think you’re maybe over-reacting. Does this per chance bring up something painful from your own past?”
Make your next birthday party a real splash by holding it at Kiwanis Recreation Center’s indoor wave pool and water slide! What could be better than three-foot waves and a double-spiral water slide? We’re giving away a Splash Bash Birthday Party valued at $175. It includes: 16 people, birthday child is free two-hour hosted public [...]
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This summer, those lovable yellow minions assemble and return to theaters when “Despicable Me 2″ opens July 3. We are sending five families (four tickets each) to a special, reserved-seating advance screening at 7pm on Thursday, June 27 at the AMC Deer Valley 30. The screening will be in Real D 3D. The film features [...]
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JUNE 2013
$6.00Great Escapes! Our updated directory of some of the best family-friendly getaways at resorts in Arizona, California, Colorado, Mexico and Nevada.
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MAY 2013
$6.00Our 2013 directory of Valley aquatics programs — everything from learn-to-swim programs to diving, racing and synchronized swimming!
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April 2013
$6.00Our April 2013 issue features the 2013 Summer Solutions directory — more than 500 day camps in Maricopa County!
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March 2013
$6.00Our March 2013 issue features the 2013 directory of Overnight Camps in Arizona and the Southwest!
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February 2013
$6.00Our February 2013 issue is all about babies! Learn how to begin building your baby’s bookshelf, make your own baby food, find parent/tot classes and Daddy Boot Camps around the Valley. Plus: gifts, gadgets and great new looks for baby.
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January 2013
$6.00It’s our annual pregnancy issue! Learn about the latest trend among expectant parents: “gender-reveal” parties. Plus: Should you bank your baby’s umbilical cord blood?
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