By Dr. Emily Newton
When a teacher raises a concern, many parents immediately fear that it means something is “wrong” or that a diagnosis will define their child’s future. What is important to know is that a teacher raising a concern is not a diagnosis. Teacher input can be an incredibly valuable piece of information because teachers have a unique opportunity to observe children in structured learning environments, social situations, and peer interactions throughout the school day. However, it is only one piece of the picture, and knowing what to do with that information makes all the difference.
What a Diagnosis Actually Means
One of the most common fears heard from parents is that a diagnosis will define their child or limit how others see them. It will not. An autism diagnosis does not change who your child is. It does not define their value, personality, strengths, or future potential. It helps explain how they experience the world so families and providers can offer the right support.
I often describe diagnosing autism as looking at a constellation. No single “star” tells the whole story. Clinicians look at developmental history, communication and social patterns, sensory experiences, and input from everyone who knows the child well. A teacher’s concern may be an important star in that constellation, but it is never the whole picture.
Autism Doesn’t Always Show Up Alone
One misconception that comes up frequently is what clinicians call “overshadowing.” This happens when a child already has a diagnosis like ADHD or anxiety, and autistic traits get explained away as simply part of that diagnosis instead. These diagnoses are not mutually exclusive, and recognizing all the factors affecting a child helps families understand which supports and accommodations may be most helpful.
What To Do First
Once a concern has been raised, here is a realistic path forward:
- Call your pediatrician or current therapist first. Request a dedicated appointment to discuss the concerns, rather than trying to manage these conversations through brief phone calls. Bring any written notes or emails from the teacher so your provider has context for what is being observed in the classroom.
- Ask about a referral. Depending on what is observed, next steps might include developmental questionnaires, monitoring patterns over time, or a formal evaluation.
- Contact your child’s school team. Many parents do not realize that schools have psychologists, speech and occupational therapists, intervention specialists, and special education teams available. You can request a school-based evaluation in writing. Always follow up verbal conversations with email so you have documentation of requests, recommendations, and timelines.
A school-based evaluation and a clinical evaluation serve different purposes. Schools focus on what supports a child needs to succeed in the classroom. A clinical evaluation, like one from Axis for Autism, looks at the full diagnostic picture and can help families access therapy, medical care, and insurance-covered services. In many cases, families benefit from both.
If you pursue an evaluation, resist the urge to present your child on their “best day.” Likewise, there is no need to focus only on challenges. The goal is not to showcase strengths or challenges—it is to help clinicians understand who your child truly is. Â
When You Don’t Agree With the Teacher
Children often behave differently at school than they do at home. The school environment places very different demands on a child, from navigating large groups of peers to managing structured routines, transitions, social expectations, and academic tasks throughout the day. Teachers may notice patterns that parents do not regularly see at home.
If you disagree with a concern, ask for a dedicated meeting with the teacher rather than a hallway conversation. Approach the conversation with openness and curiosity. Ask for specific examples. Share your own observations. Let the teacher know you are taking the concern seriously, even if you are not ready to agree with the conclusions being drawn. Maintaining a collaborative relationship can go a long way in supporting both your child and your partnership with the school.
A Note to Arizona Parents
Trust yourself enough to start the conversation. Whether that means speaking with your pediatrician, reaching out to a teacher, or scheduling an evaluation, taking the first step is often the hardest part. Remember, seeking answers does not change your child; it simply helps you better understand them. Arizona families can also find trusted resources through the Axis for Autism Parent Alliance at axisforautism.com.Â
About the AuthorÂ
Dr. Emily Newton, PsyD, BCBA, is the Vice President of Diagnostics at Axis for Autism and a licensed clinical psychologist with more than 15 years of experience in the autism field. She is passionate about providing neuro-affirming, family-centered care. Dr. Newton has held clinical leadership roles at Nationwide Children’s Hospital, Springtide Child Development, and Cortica, and completed her training at Kennedy Krieger Institute and the Center for Autism Spectrum Disorders.
