By Karen Aurit
Roses, chocolates, and jewelry are a fun way to celebrate your love, but it is the small daily gestures that create a strong foundation for a lifetime together. On Valentines Day—and every other day of the year— showing appreciation and affection will help you build a strong and lasting relationship.
“Real-life romance is fueled by a far more humdrum approach to staying connected.
It is kept alive each time you let your spouse know (they are) valued during the grind of everyday life.”
– John Gottman, Clinical Psychologist and Author of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work
While you are waiting for this year’s most romantic day, make the most of this time by giving consistent, loving gestures. Looking at each day as an opportunity to spark joy in your partner’s life will help you create the consistency, durability, trust, and passion that will sustain your life-long love.
Tips for expressing love every day of the year.
● Send ‘thinking of you’ texts, photos, and GIFs
● Touch gently and frequently throughout the day, and stop for brief hugs
● Have a date night – a candlelit dinner at home can be magical
● Put away the pajama pants and sweats and dress up just to see their eyes light up
● Pick a flower and present it as a token of love
● Stop everything, and give your undivided attention to a 5-15 minute conversation
● Listen to your partner— it is free and makes a solid impact on your relationship
● Leave romantic notes around the house or in their car
● Laugh together, dance together, sing together, and say ‘I love you’
● Make time for (at least) one passionate kiss each and every day
Simple daily actions like these can become habits that lead to a solid and enduring joyful relationship!
Let Valentine’s day inspire you to show your love, friendship, and admiration every day of the year.
Healthy Love Habits is RAK’s monthly relationship column for learning simple habits to create the healthy and loving connection you desire and deserve.
Karen Aurit, LAMFT, is Director and Co-Founder of The Aurit Center for Divorce Mediation in Scottsdale, Arizona. Karen is a Licensed Associate Marriage and Family Therapist who specializes in mindfulness theory. She is also an Adjunct Professor at The Straus Institute for Dispute Resolution at Pepperdine University School of Law and Arizona State University’s Sandra Day O’Connor School of Law. Karen is married to Michael Aurit, and they live in Phoenix, Arizona, with their three and five-year-old daughters. Karen can be reached at email@example.com. To learn more, visit www.auritmediation.com.